Tag Archives: Rihanna

Recipe Box: Amanda Bynes’ Murder My Tuna Pasta Salad

9 Apr

FOX News reports: During the past month, the “Hairspray” star has posted multiple pictures of herself in everything from blonde wigs to blue lipstick, and made a barrage of perplexing comments via Twitter such as “I want Drake to murder my vagina” and “it doesn’t matter what you think about yourself. All that matters is what your lover thinks of you.”

amanda-bynes-040813sp           Amanda Bynes has been making non-stop headlines it seems, & every week it appears that her behavior is becoming more & more bizarre! The most recent offense was when she was asked to leave a gymnastics class because she allegedly started crying after she did a cart wheel & her wig came off. She also has released statements online about her issues with her body image. She told Huffington Post, “I moved to New York and I love it! I lost 4 pounds since I moved. I am 121 pounds — my goal weight is 100.” And don’t even get me started about the Drake, murder my vagina tweet… Has Amanda Bynes officially gone crazy? Hard to say, but one thing I do know is something doesn’t smell right! She is either brilliant and acting out outrageous ways to keep everyone interested to see what she will do next or she has taken the quickest ticket to Crazytown! I can imagine that with how busy she is locking herself in dressing rooms & suing the paparazzi Bynes doesn’t have a lot of time to shower. And her new found fame and stench has inspired me to create an out of this world recipe for tuna pasta salad. (VIEW DETAILED RECIPE BELOW)

childstar5                     Amanda Bynes’ Murder My Tuna Pasta Salad: This recipe came to me yet again after a late night! …why do I get so hungry after most people go to bed? But my strange food habits are your gain because this recipe is easy but SO delicious! Anywho, I was looking up the Nickelodeon star’s twitter & just felt a sense of pity. Here was yet another child star who seems to be going down the shitter because of the fame. Her new look is not only drastic, but so ratchet/cheap looking. Maybe it’s just me, but after looking at her recent pictures I felt like you could see the sadness behind her eyes. It made me think of the homeless person you see in the corner, that is crying out for help silently. This got me thinking what is a super cheap easy meal that could fill up a homeless person’s starving belly. I got it! Tuna salad…and my mom always fed me well with pasta, so why not combine the two!

Ingredients:

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1 can of tuna
1 1/2 cups of wheel shaped pasta
2 hard boiled eggs
1/3 cup of mayonaisse
1 tablespoon of sweet relish
2 tablespoons of mustard
1/4 teaspoon of salt
1/4 teaspoon of pepper

Directions:

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1. Boil water in a pot & put the wheel pasta inside (cooktime approx. 12 minutes)

2. Open can of tuna & put in large bowl

3. Crack hard boiled eggs & mash with fork

4. Mix tuna, eggs, mayonaisse, mustard, relish, & seasoning together

5. Drain pasta & combine. Wait approx. 15 minutes for cooling & serve

MY PERSONAL SLIDESHOW OF WHAT I THINK AMANDA IS UP TO?:

amanda-bynes-dazed-and-confused-twitter-picture__oPt This look screams: Tell me I am beautiful when I wink at you!

amanda-bynes-plastic-surgery-cheek-piercings-01-435x580 She is thinking: Damn! I shouldn’t have put metal jewelry in my face when its SO cold out…brrrrr

bynes12f-2-web This photo says: Oh no! I put on too much eyelash glue & I can’t open my eye…but I kind of like it!

amanda-bynes The many personalities of Amanda Bynes! 🙂

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Recipe Box: Rihanna’s Guacamole of a Life

23 Mar

Perez Hilton reports: Rihanna’s concert in Winnipeg was delayed over 90 minutes because of an inspection conducted by border patrol. Her buses were pulled over and kept for further examination. It is believed that border patrol is to be blamed for making her fans wait…

Image           But this isn’t Rihanna’s first tardy performance. Last week she bummed out tons of fans when she appeared 4 hours late to a school charity performance. Was border patrol really to blame for this late arrival? Or is it something else? …Bad Gal RiRi has had a lot of stresses lately. She has been the talk of the town ever since she returned to the tatted arms of Chris Brown. And then she released her album, Unapologetic. Not to mention the hodge podge of touring events, photoshoots, and press interviews that she has had lately. You mix all those ingredients together and you get something beautiful… Rihanna’s Guacamole of a Life. (VIEW DETAILED RECIPE BELOW)

Image           Rihanna’s Guacamole of a Life: This recipe was inspired one late night after ransacking my fridge for a midnight snack. I thought to myself “…hmmm garlic sounds good with avocados, why not add garlic powder as well.” I just poured, chopped and mixed. As I dunked my blue corn tortilla chips into the melting pot of ingredients I used to make guacamole, I thought the stresses in my life. And as I usually do, I began to compare my life to my current celebrity crush Rihanna. I thought if I felt stressed, I could only imagine what she was going through. I thought about how much she had changed in the last few years. What she had been through… how much she had grown… What her daily schedule is like now. And I came to the conclusion that everyone has something to say about some aspect of her life (i.e. her relationship, her body, her music, her instagram) but rarely do people look Rihanna’s life as a whole. All in all, it’s a pretty amazing life! She has won numerous awards, makes great pop music, and is able to live out the love life she always wanted… There are so many different flavors in her life, sour moments, creamy moments, and the moments that leave you with a bite! As I scraped my bowl for the last remnants of guacamole I knew a recipe was born. I created a guacamole recipe that took a little bit of everything I could find & combined them to create one amazing recipe of Rihanna’s Guacamole of a Life.

Ingredients:

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3 Haas avocados, halved, seeded and peeled
2 limes, juiced
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 shallot, diced
1 tablespoon chopped cilantro
1 clove garlic, minced

Directions:

Image1. In a large bowl place the scooped avocado pulp and lime juice, toss to coat.

2. Drain, and reserve the lime juice, after all of the avocados have been coated.

3. Using a fork & knife add the salt & garlic powder and mash. Then, fold in the shallots, cilantro, & garlic.

4. Add 2 tablespoons of the reserved lime juice. Let sit at room temperature for 15 mins. & then serve.

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Recipe Box: Rihanna’s Black & Blue Sliders

12 Mar

TMZ Reported: Chris Brown has a message for Rihanna … and any other guy who might want a piece of her … back off, because “THAT IS MY P**SY!”

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It seems like this is just yet another messup for Chris Brown…and by messup I mean obvious sign that he is an abusive, controlling, psycho boyfriend! So in light of Rihanna sticking by her man, I thought I would create a delicious but volatile recipe for Black and Blue Sliders. These mini cheeseburgers are a metaphor not only for Rihanna’s black & blue face when Chris Brown decided to go all UFC fighter on her, but it also represents Rihanna’s need to stick to someone that clearly is not healthy for her. Unfortunately when something is this good it’s hard to give it up! < — I am talking about my recipe here NOT their tumultuous relationship. But in Rihanna’s defense she did warn us… In “Half of Me”, one of the songs from her latest album, “Unapologetic”. Rihanna sings, “You saw the half of it, only the half of it…You know me everybody knows that I’m crazy. Sticks & stones never break me & I’m the type that don’t give a F***!”Well thanks for the heads up RiRi… Sticks & Stones may never break you, but Chris Brown’s fists will! But your tragedy has become my recipe success. But in Rihanna’s defense she did warn us… In “Half of Me”, one of the songs from her latest album, “Unapologetic”. Rihanna sings, “You saw the half of it, only the half of it…You know me everybody knows that I’m crazy. Sticks & stones never break me & I’m the type that don’t give a F***!” Well thanks for the heads up RiRi… Sticks & Stones may never break you, but Chris Brown’s fists will! But your tragedy has become my recipe success. (VIEW DETAILED RECIPE BELOW)

Image          Rihanna’s Black & Blue Sliders: This recipe is just my funny attempt at a play on words & an excuse to make a delicious burger. In no way am I trying to make fun of a serious topic like domestic abuse! I just want to get that disclaimer out there before continuing onto the recipe. But with keeping in spirit of the mood…suggestions for serving this meal would be best served after a long night of drunken debotchery, maybe after your man comes home asking for what is apparently his!

Ingredients:

1 pound of freshly ground chuck (preferably with an 85 to 15% meat to fat ratio)
4 tablespoons of olive oil
1 teaspoon of grill seasoning
3 slices of thick cut cooked bacon
5 ounces of crumbled blue cheese
1/2 cup of thinly sliced onion
12 small burger buns of your choice

*feel free to add any burger condiments of your choice

Directions:

1. Place cold ground chuck into large bowl & chop bacon into little pieces.

2. Mix 2 tablespoons of olive oil, the chopped bacon, & 1 teaspoon of grill seasoning into meat.

3. Preheat the grill to medium-high.

4. Place thinly sliced onions and 2 tablespoons or olive oil in a small foil boat.

5. Set the foil boat on the grill to start cooking.

6. Using an ice-cream scooper roll out 12 uniform meat patties.

7. Put the patties on the grill & cook to desired temperature.

8. After cooked to desired temperature, remove patties and sprinkle on a tablespoon of blue cheese to every burger.

9. Add desired condiments & bun & then serve.

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